Multiple Life Lines

One of the things you have to remember about work is that it is NOT your life. It can be an important part of your life. It can be extremely fulfilling. When there’s stress at home, going to work can be a relief. And when there’s stress at work, going home can be a relief. […]

Do You Know How To Ask for What You Want?

Not too long ago I found myself in two very different settings that resulted in similar, uncomfortable results. In each setting the following scenario played out: – People were given the opportunity to ask a room full of experts to help them with their businesses. Name any problem with your challenge and we’ll all brainstorm […]

Living on the Edge of Incompetence

How do you feel about being incompetent? Honestly: Is it good to be incompetent? I say yes! I was reading a book recently and one section was about how no one wants to be seen as incompetent. One character in the book was having a crisis of incompetence. That got me thinking about the times […]

I Moved My Cane Today

Prop the mental cane against the corner and leave the pain where it belongs – in the past.

Are You Living on THAT? – and Other Misconceptions

Reality is an interesting concept. Sometimes I think I’m the master at being mis-understood. Why? Because I work a lot with people who aren’t like myself. They interpret the world differently than I do. Reality has three components: – Events, actions, or statements – Context (other things going on more or less at the same […]

Make Your Year-End Goal Setting Meaningful

Tis the season for people to start putting together their “to do” lists for next year.

Goals are great. Goals are necessary. But real, meaningful goals have to be coupled with action plans. Think about it this way: When I ask an audience of any size whether they want to be millionaires, virtually everyone raises their hand. Then when I ask how many have a plan to get to that status, I might get one or two hands.

Game Theory

In college-level psychology courses, one of the fun things you get to do is train mice. In addition to being easy, training mice helps you learn a lot about behavior generally and rewards and punishments specifically. Someone should write a book on training mice for kids. It’s simple. An 8 year old that can learn […]

Do You Worry Enough? Just as There’s Good Stress, So There’s Good Worry

There’s a lot of “universal” advice out there.  The always-present everyone says don’t smoke, exercise more, eat your fruits and vegetables. One piece of universal advice is to stop worrying, or at least reduce the level of worry in your life.  After all, we have plenty to worry about—Money, our children, our parents, our spouse’s […]

Introduction to Retreats

In the Monty Python movie The Holy Grail, King Arthur’s men do not use the terms “charge” and “retreat.”  Instead they use “charge” and “Run away! Run away!”  So, when I tell my friends I’m going on my annual retreat, they always say “Run away! Run away!” Part of me wants to say that I’m […]

Open Your Wallet

I have discovered two situations in which I’m willing to open my wallet and say “Here.  Take whatever you want.” The fist situation is Disneyland.  Mickey Mouse can have all the money he wants.  When we’re at Disneyland, I’m happy and relaxed.   My daughter is totally wired, bouncing off the walls, and hyperventilating with fun.  […]