Recommended Books



The Relaxation Response
by Herbert Benson and Miriam Z. Klipper.


Don't Just Do Something, Sit There
by Sylvia Boorstein.


Don't Sweat the Small Stuff at Work
by Richard Carlson.


Look for the authors above on Amazon.com, at book sales, or at your favorite web site. Amazon and others offer used books and tapes as well as new.



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See related articles on our web site:


From Values to Actions


Assigning Priorities


Building The Future



Balance is the key to personal and professional success.

 

Knowing your goals and the path to achieve them is essential.

 

Being successful takes practice and dedication.

 


Pith


Pith. n. The essential part; gist. Pithy. adj. Terse and full of meaning.



"Where you find consistency between your values and your actions, there you will find personal fulfillment and happiness."

-- Karl W. Palachuk


"Good is the enemy of great."

-- Jim Collins


"Everything living strives for wholeness."

-- Carl Jung



 

 

Newsletter

 

"It takes relaxation--and focus--to create and understand the balance in our lives."

-- Karl W. Palachuk


 

 

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What Readers Say . . .

 

 

Relax, Focus, Succeed was written for me… well… for anyone “like” me who’s ever had more to do or fires to put out than hands to pull out your own hair with. And since we’ve all been there at some point; this book will speak to you. Karl’s book reveals an escape from the ‘powering thorough’ that we do every day to get through a multitude of life without ever really ‘living’.

 

Relax, Focus, Succeed takes the reader down to the core of what makes us who we are and walks us through figuring out what we really want in life, how to maintain our center and create a well-balanced, happy, successful life. Karl is motivational and inspiring.

Hannah Welch
Marysville, CA
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I had the pleasure of attending a presentation by Karl Palachuk and found myself taking notes. His philosophy is that we need to slow down, take care of ourselves, and reprioritize our lives. I am guilty of being a workaholic and never feel like I'm accomplishing as much in a day as I should. But this is the first time I have ever given myself permission to take care of myself first--not to mention to enjoy my family and friends more.

 

And Karl was right, the work isn't going anywhere and the world won't stop spinning if I let it sit for awhile. This book is a true inspiration! I now schedule workouts into my schedule every day--something I never considered before. But I realized that I will be more productive in the long run if I'm taking care of myself. This is GREAT STUFF!

Stephanie Chandler
Sacramento, CA
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Karl has outdone himself in this book. I started reading this at a stop light and had to pull over and finish two chapters before halting my day and going home to finish the book. There are many practical and meaningful applications that are just helpful. I was pushing the limits of bad health and very bad overwork habits. This book has helped me tremendously. This book ranks with the quality of the E-myth.

 

You will pick this book up and have a hard time putting it down!

B. Vincent "Ben"
Auburn Hills, MI
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RFS™ Notes - September 2007


 

Last week in September is gone! I'm sorry this is late. We normally get the newsletter out in the last week of the month. But the last week of September was just way too busy. It literally came down to the last few hours of the month -- and then my plane was delayed.

 

October should be more mellow.

 

Where did this year go?

 

Same place they all go: We make one choice at a time. We inch a bit further along every day.

 . . .

 

Fall is always a busy season. But it's probably my favorite time of year, because our whole society takes a deep breath and admits that we really do value family events and taking some time off.

 

In my technology business, I get to see a lot of workstations. And in the Fall, that means little toys and candles, posters and decorations. People put out bowls of candy for their fellow workers, and string lights around their desk.

 

Between Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, it's like America has a low-key, three-month party going on!

 . . .

 

I've had a number of magazine interviews lately regarding the philosophy of Relax Focus Succeed®. In fact, I'll find out any day now whether I'll be on the cover of Channel Pro magazine. It's down to two faces: That's not good news for me! Anyway, that magazine is for people who run small consulting companies. So it's nice to see a bit of business philosophy compete for space with the normal mix of hardware and software.

 . . .

 

This month we look at the topics of Consistency and Stress, and how they're related to one another.

 

I welcome your feedback. Thank you, as always.


-- Karl P.



Consistency and Stress

by Karl W. Palachuk


I have been interviewed by a few magazine reporters recently regarding Relax Focus Succeed® (the book, the newsletter, etc.). It's very interesting to me where people have confusions about the RFS philosophy. Granted, most of these folks haven't read the book, the newsletter, or the web site.

 

But time and again the question comes up: How does consistency affect stress?

 

Here's the quick overview:

bullet

We all play different roles (parent, employee, manager, neighbor, spouse, etc.).

bullet

Each of these roles is like a mask we put on for an hour, a day, or part of a day. We rarely get to put on one mask and wear it for any length of time.

bullet

Which means we're changing roles (changing personalities) all the time.

bullet

In some sense, each role we play is some "distance" from our true self or our default personality.

bullet

And in another sense, our true self consists of the combination of all the roles we play.

bullet

Stress is reduced when the personality we use in each of these roles is consistent with the personality we use in each of the other roles.



A key element of stress, in this scenario, is the act of changing roles. When we put on the "work" role and plug away for eight (or nine or ten) hours, we get very comfortable in that role. This is true even on a bad day.

 

When it's time to change the role and put on the "family" role, we might not have much energy for that. Instead, we'd rather pull back into ourselves for awhile and recharge our batteries.

 

This is all very normal.

 

But sometimes we can't recharge. We leave work, pick up the dry cleaning, hit the grocery store, take the kids to an event, go to some meeting, eat dinner somewhere along the way, and finally settle down at eight or nine PM.

 

So the personality switch didn't go from work to family. It went from work to customer, to parent, to community member, to family, and maybe to spouse. Yes, all that busy activity contributes to stress. But so does taking off one hat and putting on another, and another, and another.

Even in the simplest change -- from work to family -- the less you need to change, the less stress there will be in that change. There will always be a difference between these two versions of your self.

 

So here's your homework for the month: Take some quiet time each day and think about how you might build some consistency into the various roles you play. How can the "you" at work be more like the "you" at home?

 

-----

 

Another area of stress is the values differential.

 

In each role we play, we try to maximize a set of values (love, productivity, profit, etc.). So as we switch roles, we also adjust the values we're balancing at any given time. Again, this switch causes a certain level of stress.

 

One of the interesting features of the human mind is that we're capable of holding two (or more) opposing views at the same time. Even in one job you might be nurturing a client in one meeting and turning a client over to collections an hour later. We love our clients, but they need to pay their bills. :-)

 

Switching roles at work creates one level of stress. But even there you'll have a certain level of consistency in the roles you play. When you switch to spouse, parent, or community member, the values can be quite different.

 

Another interesting aspect of the human mind is our ability to "change reality" by changing our focus or perspective. You've seen examples of this: If you go into something with a positive attitude, you'll have positive results. If you go in with a pessimistic attitude, your results will be less positive.

 

If you apply this same approach to the roles in your life, it can have a strong positive effect. Here's how: Don't focus on the differences in your roles or the different values that have to be maximized. Instead, focus on the similarities and the consistencies.

 

To the extent you focus on differences, you will create stress. To the extent that you focus on consistencies, you'll reduce stress.

 

And remember my old rule:

 

Whatever you put your attention on,

that's what you're going to get better at.

 

So if you focus on differences, you'll get good at recognizing the differences. If you focus on consistencies, you'll get good at seeing consistencies. And if you put your attention on building consistency between the various roles in your life, you'll have more consistency. And less stress.

 

Good Luck!

 

 

Focus:

 

"A problem only exists if there is a difference between what is actually happening and what you desire to be happening."
 

-- Kenneth Blanchard and Spencer Johnson



If you like pithy quotes, check out the Pith Page at

www.relaxfocussucceed.com/Pith.htm


### RFS ###



Thank You!


That's it for this issue.


Please pass this newsletter on to a friend. But please pass is along in its entirety. Thank you.


If you received this newsletter from a friend, sign up for your own free copy at

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I welcome your feedback.


-- Karl W. Palachuk


 

Of Interest





Raves

 

This is one of the best books I have ever read, I have many on business motivation as well as many for your personal life and these seem to contradict each other. Karl shows you how to create the necessary balance in your life. I did not realize how much unnecessary stress I was causing myself until Karl pointed it out, this made an immediate impact in my life in all three areas Personal, Family and Business. I highly recommend this book especially for anyone trying to run their own business.

Bret Meche

Opelousas, LA
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The most important thing Karl's book did for me was to remind me of how important it is to relax in order to be successful. Too often we get so busy that we forget to take time to relax in order to focus our minds and thereby succeed. Karl's exercises throughout the book are very practical.

Sue Lynn Canfield
Roseville, CA
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I love the way Karl's book makes powerful and grounded statements. He is motivational, informative and hits the nail on the head. I recommend his book highly and I recommend it to my clients who are working toward more balance and relaxation in their lives.

Jenifer Novak Landers

Folsom, CA
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I will be rereading this book constantly until I get every habit fully ingrained in my head. I am off to buy a notebook for my "quite time".


Thank you Karl!

Brielle Beard
Oklahoma
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I have read, and re-read this book from cover to cover. Its a fantastic book.
This book shows you how to do as the title says Relax, Focus and Succeed.

 

Brilliant book . . . highly recommended.

Chris Timm
UK
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