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Whining puts the attention on the whiner, not on the issue at hand.


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"It takes relaxation--and focus--to create and understand the balance in our lives."

-- Karl W. Palachuk



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What Readers Say . . .



Relax, Focus, Succeed was written for me… well… for anyone “like” me who’s ever had more to do or fires to put out than hands to pull out your own hair with. And since we’ve all been there at some point; this book will speak to you. Karl’s book reveals an escape from the ‘powering thorough’ that we do every day to get through a multitude of life without ever really ‘living’.


Relax, Focus, Succeed takes the reader down to the core of what makes us who we are and walks us through figuring out what we really want in life, how to maintain our center and create a well-balanced, happy, successful life. Karl is motivational and inspiring.

Hannah Welch
Marysville, CA
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I had the pleasure of attending a presentation by Karl Palachuk and found myself taking notes. His philosophy is that we need to slow down, take care of ourselves, and reprioritize our lives. I am guilty of being a workaholic and never feel like I'm accomplishing as much in a day as I should. But this is the first time I have ever given myself permission to take care of myself first--not to mention to enjoy my family and friends more.


And Karl was right, the work isn't going anywhere and the world won't stop spinning if I let it sit for awhile. This book is a true inspiration! I now schedule workouts into my schedule every day--something I never considered before. But I realized that I will be more productive in the long run if I'm taking care of myself. This is GREAT STUFF!

Stephanie Chandler
Sacramento, CA
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Karl has outdone himself in this book. I started reading this at a stop light and had to pull over and finish two chapters before halting my day and going home to finish the book. There are many practical and meaningful applications that are just helpful. I was pushing the limits of bad health and very bad overwork habits. This book has helped me tremendously. This book ranks with the quality of the E-myth.


You will pick this book up and have a hard time putting it down!

B. Vincent "Ben"
Auburn Hills, MI
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No Whining, Please

by Karl W. Palachuk

Did you ever say something you regretted? I mean regretted immediately. Before the sound waves actually reached the other person's ear, you were wishing you hadn't said that.

What you said was true, and you believed it. But you didn't phrase it just right.

This regret can be heightened in marriage, because you know the thing you said is "out there" and can be thrown back at you again and again for the rest of your life.

I said something like that once. Awhile back my wife and I were talking. I don't remember what it was about, and I doubt she does either, when I uttered the following words, which will live forever in my marriage:

"Try to focus on not whining."

As a general rule, I encourage you to avoid the phrase "Try to focus on not whining." It's really not a good thing for most relationships.

But I have to say, most of us could use a gentle prodding reminder once in a while. Luckily for me, my wife has a sense of humor. My regrettable phrase has worked its way into our lives.

For example, I might start discussing yard work and then go off on a tangent about transplanting roses and how this bush died, and you'd think one out of four bushes is a bit too high for a failure rate, and blah blah blah.

At this point, my wife says "Try to focus . . .." She doesn't even have to finish the sentence.

We need to be reminded to Focus on Not Whining. This is different from remembering to stop whining, or to avoid whining. Those things are good, but they're actually different from focusing on not whining.

When you focus on not whining, it means you actively place your attention on not whining. We all have complaints -- and legitimate complaints -- but sometimes we go beyond the legitimate statement of a problem into a serious, non-stop, can't say a good thing, bring-it-all-out whining session.

Whining is different from complaining. Whining puts the attention on the whiner, not on the issue at hand.

Whining doesn't really care about a "fix" to the problem. Whiners just care that you know how horrible this is for them.

Complaining, if it's done correctly, can put attention on an issue and solve a problem.

Whining simply allows the whiners to wallow in pity and take the stand that life is unfair to them. They don't play a role in their problems: life happens to them.



"The path of your life isn't forced upon you; your 'fate' is what you get to shape every day by what you choose to do or not do.


I think what happens to so many people is that they become overwhelmed with those choices; they're so afraid of making a wrong choice about the direction of their life that they make no choice . . .


and then they sit there paralyzed, trying to convince themselves that their unhappiness isn't their fault. It's fate's fault."


-- Philip Van Munching



When you focus on not whining, you say "Stuff happens. Let's move on. What's next?" When you focus on not whining, you place emphasis on productive, useful complaints that are articulated in such a way that they can bring solutions.

You've certainly heard the question:

Are you part of the solution,

or part of the problem?


Whiners are part of the problem!

Emotional steam. Sometimes our "whining" is really just blowing off steam. We get worked up about one little thing after another. First you stub your toe in the morning. Then the newspaper's wet. The dog spills his water bowl, your kid left the garage door open all night, you burn your toast, and maybe there's a little coffee spill.

You're human and it gets pretty frustrating sometimes.

Sometimes, whining is just meaningless expression of emotional steam. Stuff happens. Make sure, when you do this kind of whining, that it's short-lived, focused on the moment, and that you put it behind you quickly.

Apologize to everyone within earshot.

And then move on.

Try to focus on not whining.

Then commit to having a good day for the rest of the day.

As with all habits of success, not whining takes practice. Be patient with yourself. You can start over immediately after you slide backward. No one's keeping score, but everyone will notice as you become more successful!

### RFS ###

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Of Interest



This is one of the best books I have ever read, I have many on business motivation as well as many for your personal life and these seem to contradict each other. Karl shows you how to create the necessary balance in your life. I did not realize how much unnecessary stress I was causing myself until Karl pointed it out, this made an immediate impact in my life in all three areas Personal, Family and Business. I highly recommend this book especially for anyone trying to run their own business.

Bret Meche

Opelousas, LA
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The most important thing Karl's book did for me was to remind me of how important it is to relax in order to be successful. Too often we get so busy that we forget to take time to relax in order to focus our minds and thereby succeed. Karl's exercises throughout the book are very practical.

Sue Lynn Canfield
Roseville, CA
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I love the way Karl's book makes powerful and grounded statements. He is motivational, informative and hits the nail on the head. I recommend his book highly and I recommend it to my clients who are working toward more balance and relaxation in their lives.

Jenifer Novak Landers

Folsom, CA
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I will be rereading this book constantly until I get every habit fully ingrained in my head. I am off to buy a notebook for my "quite time".

Thank you Karl!

Brielle Beard
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I have read, and re-read this book from cover to cover. Its a fantastic book.
This book shows you how to do as the title says Relax, Focus and Succeed.


Brilliant book . . . highly recommended.

Chris Timm
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